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Thursday, June 9, 2011

The Legacy of the Pink Dress Kirk Murphy's Story Day 3 | Maris Ehlers Photography

There was some confusion on a picture used in the promos etc. showing a child in a long pink dress.  Some people made the incorrect assumption that it was Kirk in the pink dress (seriously, he would have had a laugh over that one), and sure enough a newspaper in the UK picked up the story and had that picture of him at the top of the article with an inaccurate comment about girls clothing.  Really?  A little fact checking would have been in order here.

Anyway, it was me in the dress.  The reason why the picture was there in the first place was because Kirk GAVE me the dress, and it is one of my most treasured memories.

If you're interested, you can read about the legacy of the pink dress just by clicking this little link.

I still have the dress. It's now in my daughter's closet, ready for playing "dress up" whenever she's big enough to fit in it.  Which, now that I think about it, might be tomorrow.

I hadn't read this eulogy since his funeral until Jim at Box Turtle Bulletin was asking if there were any.  There are two other eulogies that also give you some insight into Kirk's life.  One from his boss Frank, and one from his two very close friends, Debbie and Tim.  They are still hard to read, but even then, in 2003, you can tell that nothing really added up and we didn't know what to do about it.

Regardless of how tragic, dark or sad a situation can be, there is always a silver lining.  Sometimes we REALLY have to be patient and wait for it, but eventually we find it.  Kirk's story is no exception.  Today, we leave you with two that we have found.  

Most people who lose someone to suicide are left with grief, memories and unanswered questions.  We at least now understand more about Kirk, why it was so hard for him to let people get close to him and why he finally, at the age of 38, just gave up.  While it doesn't bring closure, it does bring a sense of peace that we are thankful for.

If Kirk's story changes the way even ONE person thinks about how they treat someone they supposedly love unconditionally, and therefore makes the life of ONE person struggling because they don't "fit" in, then we are humbled beyond belief and this agonizing journey will be worth it.

As we wait for the last segment on AC360 to air tonight, I am reminded of one of my most favorite quotes. 

"Now this is not the end. It is not even the beginning of the end. But it is, perhaps, the end of the beginning."

-Winston Churchill

Dear God, let's hope so.  Because this treatment of our children has to stop.  

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